Everyone Wants to Know by Kelly Loy Gilbert

Author:Kelly Loy Gilbert
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers
Published: 2023-06-13T00:00:00+00:00

* * *

In the end Lauren and our mother and Jamison, probably in conjunction with our dad, agree the best solution with Wrangell is to wait and see. I wish they’d try harder to talk to him, but waiting is probably better than anything they could say publicly. I am sick with worry and sadness, haunted by what I said to Julie in the airport, unable to sit still or think about anything else.

Atticus tells me he thinks it’ll be fine, that Wrangell’s just being Wrangell and needs space. Skye is weirdly, uncharacteristically hard to reach. (So many posts about the amazingness of Baylor, though!) I have nightmares all night that she’s on his side somehow, also trying to distance herself. I wake up at three so distressed I debate calling Caden. Maybe I could spend the rest of the night there; it might even be worth the awful drive. I could lie next to someone and maybe he’d put his arm around me, maybe I’d nestle against him, and I would be able to turn off my thoughts. Then I fall asleep again anyway and descend into more nightmares.

The next morning I wake up on edge that Wrangell’s going to say something more public, and I’m distracted with worry all through class. By third period I can’t take it anymore, and at recess I find Atticus to tell him I’m going to go talk to Wrangell.

“Right now?” he says. “Does he know you’re coming?”

“I’ve texted him, like, four times since last night, but he hasn’t answered.”

“So, what, you’re just going to show up at his house?”

“That’s the plan.”

“How do you even know he’s there? What if he’s at Julie’s?”

“They said she has roommates. I doubt they’re ever at her house.”

“I don’t know if it’s worth your time,” he says. “What are you going to say? You know how Wrangell gets. He’s probably still mad about his day in Kauai and pissed how everything turned out.”

“I know he probably is. That’s why I think someone has to talk to him, so it doesn’t just get worse. Everything’s just––falling apart. And I don’t think it’s fair for him to blame Mom and everyone else like this. Dad, sure, yes, but Mom’s not the one having some bizarre fling with Heather Young. She’s a victim too. If Wrangell’s so angry, he should just have it out with Dad.”

“Yeah, well, if you try to tell him that, I see that going exactly nowhere.”

“Also—I haven’t told anyone this, but I’m worried he might be mad at me specifically.”

“Why you specifically?”

I debate telling him everything but lose my nerve. I tell him about what I said to Julie at the airport instead.

“Oh fuck,” he says. “Does Wrangell know?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know if Julie told him or not. Don’t tell him.”

“Yeah, obviously I’m not going to tell him, because I would like for my twin not to die at seventeen. Maybe you shouldn’t go see him. He’s really into Julie. He’s probably going to kill you if he knows.

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